magical conclusion
i havent blogged in a long time. well, i havent really run into any random events or...ive just had a disease, in which i am not able to blog...just because. anyways, besides that, an orange knocked me in the shnaz today. yup. too slow to catch it. sad stuff. and uh, yea. my left shoe. it refuses to be tied. i think i have encountered an abnormal shoe. friggen shoe. i mean, i tie the thing, and waddaya know! yea. you guessed it. anyways, have you ever seen magical skates? cuz i havent. yep. have you ever seen magical batteries? cuz i havent. but i believe there are some in my cd player. ive come to this conclusion because i have used that thing all last week. all this week. almost everyday. and just today for about 3 hours. and those batteries keep on truckin. so i dunno. and im not gonna check the brand cuz itll totally destroy my theory of magical batteries. so yea. whatever. ya know, when i began writing this particular blog, it was 11:50pm of dec 31 2005. it is now 12:10am of jan 1 2006. guess what that means! this blog has been compiled throughout 2 different years! booyah! happy new year!!! im out.-hence-
gingerbread crotch
i experienced a new experience today. twas a gingerbread man. i felt sorry for him. no i didnt. yea, we ate his house. but even before that started, something...hmmm how should i describe it...o well i cant think of a descriptive word to describe the something. so yea, the gingerbread man got bitten off his crotch. even though he begged for mercy of his crotch to be spared, he was left crotchless. well, just think of it this way. if he had major crotch-rot, he should be thankful right? ya know...im gonna leave. yea, im out. -hence-
illegally unnoticed
ya know what? i noticed two things today. two wrong things. i went to zehrs again. i bought this jolly rancher story book. it had a story in it. twas a story about a snowman that came to life. sound familiar? frosty the snowman, you would think.....but no! jolly the snowman! now what in blue blazes is goin on here? frosty is trademark material! rancher cant just steal the story and ruin it for everyone! man...yea, i needed to express that just because its wrong. i noticed another wrong thing. i was watching the one movie called "the santa claus 2." anyways, the one guy calls the other dude, a 'sad strange little man.' hmmm. does that sound familiar? ever watched toy story? now, im sure that toy story came out way before santa's second film. i mean, whats with this world? just stealing people's ideas like its nobody's....or shall i say everyone's business! crap. anyways, yea. do what you usually do. read this and dont comment. im out.-guy that enjoys spending his time by sticking jolly rancher wrappers on his bedroom wall-
mc squared
i went to the store earlier today, and while walking past, i caught a short glance at the one guy emptying the mailbox. and i swear it was einstein. then right after that happened, i entered the zehrs double doors and another guy that has lived in ancient days, i walked by. and i swear it was the guy from monopoly. but thats life somtimes. you see people you dont expect to see. anyways, im out. -hence-
smokin some Persian rugs. yes, rugs.
today i experienced one of thee awesomest things one can ever experience. snowboarding is freakin awesome!! screw the bunny hills! take it all the way to the extreme hills! yea! man, snowboarding is a good feeling. yup. (.....) those dots in brackets represent a period of about 2 hours. so 2 hours ago i wrote about snowboarding. ya know, studying can eat poo. i have so much junk to do, and i dont even care. i bet you dont even care to hear it, so ill just stop talking bout that crap. well, i gotta go take a squeeg. im out.-guy that has been distracted from his studying by looking at his hand through a microscope-
buzzards, not geezers
i journeyed to pet smart the other day. theyre planning something. those birds. funny, i didnt feel it much when walking past the other creatures. but those birds. all of em. chirping, hopping... we cant understand their chirpy conversations. i mean, think about it. imagine you...as a bird. what a wonderful life! feeling the wind flow through your wings and...BAM! into a net....well, maybe a net wouldnt make a BAM noise, but thats not the point. the point is those birds! theyre planning something. those birds. im serious! we gotta watch out! maybe someday...ill free them. those birds. cause personally, i dont really feel like being killed by a bird wound to the head...or where ever else they pound theyre beaks into...but anyways, yea. thats my story of them. those birds. excuse me now as i finish my chocolate pie. im out.
-guy that is becomeing sick because of consumation of too many halls cough drops-
a failed pretzel.
i used to like pretzels. i still do like them. but i used to like them with a respect for them. that respect no longer dwells in my stomach. earlier this used-to-be-fine evening, my hand contained a handful of pretzels. i had gloves on because my hands were gloved. it was cold outside. those pretzels didnt stay in my hand. they have failed me. as i watched those salty pieces of grub slip...and fall onto the cold stone ground, ...man this is dum. i dont feel like talking about these stupid pretzels any longer. ill just continue my life killing as many as possible. im out.
kinder junk
i cannot believe that. i just cant. ok, you know those awesome kinder surprises you used to get when you were a kid? yea, well i got one the other day, jus to reflect back on those good ol' days....when i had no worries....when homework didnt become suicidel....when i collected kinder surprises. yup, it was a pretty cool toy too...but thats not the point. i got this other lil piece of paper that gave me a friggen code. in which you type in and get an internet surprise! so...i did that, and it made me choose a level. i chose the hardest, cause obviously, this game is for kids ya know...so how hard can it get? anyways, it was a pretty swell game...until i could not figure the freakin thing out! i did everything! i mean, how can they do that to kids? cmon! were not raising geniouses here! im in college for crying out crap! i understand it was on the hardest level, but still!!! its supposed to be for like 10 years olds or younger! i mean, if anyone THAT young can figure out that STUPID game...i must be stupid. then how did i get this far in school? so crap. that game is just wrong. its just not right, cause its wrong. it should be banned from the internet. friggen game. oh! and another thing! the background music in the game was some pretty groovin tunes. its just such a sad shame to waste such good music on such a piece of junk. an unbeatable piece of rotten applesauce. im out. -guy that is...he just cannot understand the games "supposedly" for kids these days-
poo
its supposed to be members. not memebers. poo to that.
all wrong.
ok! im finally done all that copy and paste crap. yay, yup. well this is now a current entry. oh, and by the way, all the times at the bottom of each blog are ALL WRONG! its like 10:40pm...not 7 or 8 or wutever it says. anyways...just..dont listen to the time. the blogger spot peoples think theyre on top of the world. they think they own this bloggin world, with their automatic time! but no! its wrong! all wrong! yea...right. anyways, to go to thee original place where all these blogs originally originated from, go to www.spaces.msn.com/memebers/barfbag
and to hear some hence go to
www.purevolume.com/hencetheonemanband
im out.
-hence-
long johns
from today!!wow. long time ive expressed random junk on here. hey, this is thee last blog ill ever post on my msn space. yup. i gotta blogspot. i gotta use that now. this is also thee last day im 17. yup. im an official adult tomorrow. yup. cool. hey, yesterday ben and i were walkin. and i saw this old guy. in his car. he was listening to rap. think about it...an old guy chillin to rap. "yo, wuts up in the fogey town? im not goin up the hill, but down!" i dunno. but im not goin there...my last blog went onto the geezer sub, so this time ill...ill stop. i bought some long johns today. tried wearing them, but theyre itchy. so BRING IT ON COLDNESS!!!...ahh hehe, maybe not. maybe i can endure being itchy. ...man. i havent consumed an apple for weeks. well not everyday. i killed one yesterday. but i havent actually smacked a core through a solid chuck recently. its tearing my apple side apart. i bought some gala today tho. welcome back, gala. this seems to be a boring blog. theres something i really wanna "right" about, but i cant think of it. its...its driving me nuts!! im going INSAME!! lol..insame. cool word. hey..i still dont have a wooden freakin chair. all i can do is shake my head. crap. this blog isnt going anywhere. im out. wait, i made a new song. but ill save it for when its released... im out. -hence-
thee oldies
from Nov 15i found out something tonight. you know that frozen juice thats supposedly supposed to be mixed into a much more bigger mass of water? yea, well, ya dont need the water. i mean, why add water? it gives u more yea, but if ya just let the juice thaw out, its easy to just drink as it is. its sweeter yes, but its so much more flavorful. that folks, is what i, hence, has found out. what a conservative way to conserve fresh water! and hey! i just had another thought. this is a great idea for buzzards, because when ya get old..energy just seems to...die. so they dont have the energy to take the pitcher from the cupboard, pour in water, squeeze out the frozen juice, get a wooden spoon, mix it (and mixing it is the REAL energy-needed activity), and THEN...pour some of it into a glass. MAN! thats alot of work for them! so yea...this idea just eliminates all that junk. ya dont even havta freeze it! just set it on the counter. wait. and...oh yea....now that its all un-frozen its easy to open. and then just drink it. this is also good cuz when ya get older, your tastebuds are filed off from the many various types of grub you've killed over the decades....or centuries. so yea, the sweeter the juice is, the better. and even ANOTHER thing! its gonna have so much sugar in it, that itll be an extra boost of that lackage of energy that old fogeys tend to get. but anyways...this wasnt really supposed to be centered on the folks over-the-hill. but about juice. im out.-hence-
smelly gloves
from Nov 13i encountered a pair of gloves this weekend. red gloves. and they smelled. not a bad smell. a good smell....well yea, if its not bad, its good. anyways, yea, they smelled like jellybeans. so, depending on whether u like or dislike jellybeans, it could have been a bad or good smell for you. yea...that was my encounter this weekend as i said earlier. im thinkin about getting a wooden chair for my current seat. yea, if u really wanna know...leave a comment with your email. i dont wanna get too crazy on here...even though i have in the past. its just tonight, im really feeling un-nuts. im out.-guy that cannot figure out why most desks aren't blue-
mcdonlads
from Nov 08i experienced my first ever all-nighter...and it was aweome. 5 of us...all night in cliff's room. playing truth or dare. wow...some crazy stuff..yea. some very good convos tho. i liked it. yup. 3 of us had an 8:15am class too. we're crazy. we wet to mcdonalds for breakfast. and that mcdonalds visit has changed my entire view of mcdonlads. LOL...mcdonlads!! sweet!!...yea. mcdonalds is no longer mcdonalds, but now mcdonlads. anyways...i just found out BLT 's at mcdonlads are AWESOME! good riddance to pizza. BLT all the way! i also noticed the pla area. it brought me back to my childhood. thats one disadvantage of being older. no more mcdonlad's playground. i miss those good times. hey! i saw a game cube in there! whats with that?!?? i dont remeber a nintendo 64 in there way back when. i...i just cant fathom(a hence inteligent word) the idea. but yea...jus forget i mentioned it. i uhh..i really should do some homework. ...and buy some apples, tomorrow. im out.-guy that is thankful headgear retainers do not apply these days-
innocent criminal
from Nov 06yea, uhh....yup. i hadda weird day today. actually i didnt even have a day. i went to sleep at 7:30am saturday morning. i woke up 6pm saturday evening. in others words, when most of the city was getting up, i was startin the shut-eye process, and when people were killin thier evening grub, i was....awakened! yup. i decided around 8pm that i should get out. so i did..go out. twas strolling along when in comes the academic building into my vision. i thought, 'hey! maybe its open!" so when i arrived in fornt of those familiar glass double doors, i peered in. it was all dark, but i pulled open the door anyways. it was open. then the alarm went off. i felt pretty stupid right then and there. and i really didnt know what to do. so yea. i just stood there stupidly, feeling like an innocent criminal. yup. that was my un-day. im out.-guy that has a sore on his foot from sleeping in socks and sandals, and may have to quite the day job of wearing the super-cool socks and sandals fad-
exam!
from Nov 03wow! i just came back from the most brutal exam!...well actually that was an hour ago, but still! but im serious, literally, i almost died in that exam. i could feel an....no not an...THEE invisible knife puntured through my chest into my heart! and then near the end of the exam a second invisible knife was driven into my throat. at that point in my life, i wished i could become invisible man. then i could wrench those JUNK KNIVES OUTTA MYSELF!!! umm..ahem. sorry bout that. yup. but guess wut, i finished the exam. and i felt like pretty much, roasted roadkill. that exam was brutal. but another good thing....yup there is a good thing, there's (whispers) *no more midterms!* NO MORE MIDTERMS booyah! yup. nothin too big to be excited about, stop shouting. im out.-hence-
bad apple
from Nov 02i bit into a gala just now. that first bite just didnt taste right. neither have the next several chunks. i wonder if this is a message from the gala world. this apple just doesnt taste right. ....o well! im still gonna chuck it.. here goes! that was a solid chuck. peace out, all u applecore chuckin freaks.-hence-
no moo
from Nov 01dum thing. u know those milk cartons that go mooooo and u win somethin? i had one. it didnt moo. now im sad. yea. heres a lil rap thing for ya to ponder on....ahh forget it, it was a dum idea. im in a really bad mood right now. it sucks. i havta do some homework tonight. not fun. but o well. hey! why are you even reading this boring blog? man, u too must be bored. go eat an apple, and chuck the core then. ya know, i think i might do that. wheres a cliff? i havta jump off it. yup, i fellin pretty much like an earthworm. and earthworm fried by a magnifying glass. yup, like wut i used to do with those things. im out.-guy that really doesnt know why, maybe he does, but is feeling like a fried earthworm-
everyday low prices!
from Oct 31 ya know, ben and i were walking through walmart the other day, looking for post-it notes. if ya dont know wut those are, ur sad. anyways...uhh..gotta get this frustration out... POST IT NOTES..FOR ALMOST 6 BUCKS!!!! and right above that it says, "everyday, low prices!" my applecore! give me a break, 6 bucks for 3 things of post its. wutta rip. anyways, done with that. i was bored that other day, start playin around with sticky tak. its sorta weird stuff. it can actually fall apart. yup. i was bored. i found out recently that im a backseat sorta guy. yup. everytime theres 3 people goin into a vehicle, bam! im in the backseat. its just where im supposed to be. i mean, even if im driving, im in the backseat. yea. well, it works out in my mind, dunno about yours. im out.-hence-
orange sand
from Oct 27a friend and i just got back from exploring the forest by our college. it was fun. there r so many trees to climb in there, it brought me back to my childhood...or young teenage years. we also found some pretty interesting stuff. for example, items from other planets. yup, u guessed it, we stumbled across a missile filled with sand from...we're guessing mars. orange sand. and i'll let you ponder on that experience. im out.-guy that stumbled upon an attempted bomb from outerspace originally planning to wipe out the earth and fill it with sand. orange sand. from mars.-actually im gonna add on to this blog. there are a few more things on my mind. i put up new targets on our wall to chuck apple cores at. theyre basically dissing applesauce. i mean, why eat applesauce when theres no core afterwards to chuck? its pointless. therefore, applesauce must be destroyed. umm..uh..im kinda holding this in so uh..dont mind if i shout but uh.... EAT APPLES THE REAL WAY!!! man! well, thanks. i feel good now. wait..this is the wrong font..its too big. ok, and this font seems too small. man..wutever! geez! font size these days..just getting too complicated. yup. i had an interesting experience yesterday evening. on the way to an awesome time bowling, i rode in a small vehicle filled with seven people. and your thinkin....hows that possible? well, it is, and this is how: and yup, i was the lucky was laying across the 3 people sitting in the backseat. fun stuff. im out.-hence-
this womps
another from Oct 26man this womps. that last blog entitiled 'apples' actually isnt my shortest blog. but this is! YEA! ALRIGHT! YEA! BOOYAH! uhhh..yup. im out. -hence-
apples
from Oct 26hey. i had an apple core collection. it was on my desk by my keyboard. i just threw out all the apple cores. it was hard to seperate from them. but i managed. this is thee shortest blog in my blog inventory. thanks for reading. im out. -guy that just swallowed a chunk of apple, and that eats way too many apples-
brilliant idea
from Oct 18yo. people. yup. this is a borin blog......YEA RIGHT! I COULDNT WAIT TO WRITE THIS THING! anyways...my roommate, benny, came up with this awesome game. well, heres thee background story. he eats a lot of apples, and now i do too. gala are the best, by the way. anyways, today, he just chucked his apple core at the wall of our room. and yea, thats the game. after were done our apple..away it goes!...until....BAM! into the wall! sometimes its cool to watch, cuz sometimes the thing'll explode once it...lemme use a big word, or smart word in a hence* way...impacts itself into the wall. its just an amazing experience. wut a brilliant idea that was. thanks roommate. but, afterwards, i just started to ponder...another intelligent word used by hence...about the whole game, and i laughed. and i couldnt stop. yup. it was a laughing tantrum, and BOY! did that feel good! man! i love those things. but yea, it twas a good laugh. good times. now everytime i consume....yet another great word...an apple, i get anxious to throw it against the wall....jus CHUCK IT! *hence - www.purevolume.com/hencetheonemanband. <<>
a violent hence song
from Oct 15i could put my freakin foot through that moniter..... man, im thankful its online, but geez! why it freeze! i eat cheeze! anyways, ya. its frozen. so im using my roomate, justin's computer. he's a good guy. but yea, i really need to get my laptop fixed. i actually made a song about the one computer im using right now, the slow one. its goes something like this: 'i have a computer, that is slow. you wanna know why its slow?" and while im singin that, its all calm, picking the guitar notes....and then...i answer the question. "IT SUCKS!!!!!!" IT SUCKS!!!!" and yea, i scream that while playing G and C. good ol' G and C chords. im out.-guy with sore throat because of screaming too much-
dont try this at home kids
from Oct 13man, i am sure the procrastinator. yup. it took my roommate and i several hours 2nite to get our homework done, which is due for tomorrow. we started at like midnight, wasting 2 hours from 10-12, and then moved on. so in between our homework we had several procrastinational events in which we sang a hence duet. (for more info, go to purevolume.com, and go to hence the one man band) anyways, yea. i dunno why im typin at this keyboard. i hate this keyboard right now. i typed on it for the last 6 hours. on and off. yea, its 7am in the morning, and im about to go to sleep. pretty sad eh? yea. b4 we started workin on our homework, we were having a laughing fit over how late it was and we still hadnt started theology. thats wut happens when its late at night. u go crazy. dont take examples from us. (benny & hencey) yea. thats us. but yea. right now, i am not i my right mind. im sitting here, with my pants pulled down at my feet. just sittin in my boxers. yea. just cuz i feel like it. thats how it is when its late. or should i say early in the morning. man this is a long blog. i should actually get to sleep, its 6:56am. but please kids, people, adults, even old buzzards, whoever is reading this, dont take after us. unless ur experienced. im out.-guy that has went through a night(morning) of procrastinatonal homework, and that has gone crazy-
i am happy
and yet another....from Oct 11hi people....if any people do read this. um, yea, im happy. cuz i figured out how to get internet on the computer i am borrowing from my cousins! its AWESOME! i mean, i would prefer the laptop, but this is good!!...since my laptop is toast, like i explained in the last two blogs, earlier this evening. ya know, i dont think ive ever written 3 blogs in a period of 3 - 4 hours! insane i know. but this is a must blog. ive got everything i need on here. its great. im on here right now. i dont havta use my roommates computer anymore! man! this is great! i am a happy lad! i am out!-the guy that has experienced being really down and really happy in one evening-
arrg...no that was lame....ARRRGGGGGHHHAHAHAHA!
yet another, from Oct 11yup, i know. i JUST wrote a blog about the laptop. yup. i just feel like goin ARRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHhhHhHHh! YEA, THATS WHAT I FEEL LIKE DOING. oops, that part wasnt supposed to be in caps. OH WELL! TOOO BAD! why....oh WHY doest thou laptop faileth beforth thine eyes?!?!? ~~~~shudder~~~~ geez! ya know, i should write a song about this. yea. and itll have alot of screaming in it. yea, thats right. im out. cuz im gonna go out and scream the laptop song. yea. scream it. SCREAM IT. SCREEEEEAAAAAAMM IIIIITTTT!!!!!!!!!!!! RAAAAAURGAGAGAHARAGUAGAHRAGUAHUG!YUP. yup. yup.yup. im out.-the guy having a second experience of writing this type of blog-
mad
from Oct 11my laptop is officially screwed. im mad. im sad. this sucks. ill probly havta get it restored which..gues what..requires money, and my saved data to go 'toodle doo! down the drain i go!' and to make matters worse, i cannot figure out somthing fital for my grade here at college, the chips i bought are bbq rather than regular, and i think im getting arthristis in my left forefinger. yup, the thing u get when ur like 71. i guess i am 71....and all this time i thought i was 17! numbers getting mixed up..wutta sad shame. wutta sad laptop. oh, by the way, i am not in any way blaming the seller of this laptop, for he is my good friend. altho i AM BLAMING..thee uh....LAPTOP. curse you laptop! yea...it needs a good pounding. i am sad. at least some of my paint pictures are saved right on my space here...and some arent. im out.-guy that has an officially screwed laptop and is sad.-
not really a front flip
from Oct 05 k people. remember this: when about to do a front flip off of a 10 foot cliff into water, make sure u have enough spin and thrust. or else, itll be pretty much a back flop. please, i beg of u, never attempt one of these. the pain is unbearable. thanks for your time.-the guy with back flop experience-
thank God for scented spray
from Sept 20boy oh boy. did that stank. man. dont u ever have those dumps that rank so bad, that u would think that something died in ur bowels? yup. ive had that too. ive had that today. thank God for scented spray. i mean, right when the thing pokes its' head outta the rectum.....BAM! BAD SMELL! its like a groundhog reaching the surface and then breathing out REALLY BAD breath occumilated after weeks and months. except just do that whole process up-side down into a round white bowl with water in it. thank God for scented spray. ive got homework. college homework. im out. im out for awhile. a long while. a good long while. a good long while of TORTURE. yea. im out. im out for a while. a long...yea, im done.
too late
from July 23man, this is sad. i get no support in my decision to bust a mutant blister. all i can do is shake my head. but then again, it wouldntve mattered cuz i wouldve still done it. n i did. i feel good. it was a sick sight tho. ....im not goin there tho. im out.
should i?
from July 22
hey people out in the world readin this brief message. i need ur opinion. i hava mutant blister on my hand. should i bust it? ...my opinion is yes..im seriously thinkin of doin so. please comment on this sad entry. ill be back on in about 4 hours. if not, 24 hours. anyways, happy opinion makin.
wuzzapp?!?!?
from July 06wuzzaaap to all those people who enter the domains of my space. yea, ya know i really dont feel like typing. yea. well, jus always remember....and no, im not gonna tell ya to tie ur shoes......im jus gonna say...that, well, when u feel somthin pushin out "the other end" think to urself b4 u heave with all ur mite. cuz, ya know, things happen and well, .....it just may be more than just a fart. yea. ya dont wanna get there. anyways...um, yea. like i said, im not in much of a typin mood rite now. its late n i need sleep. cuz, people need to sleep, specially teenagers like myself. sleep's good. many of u can agree to that. yea. yup. right on. hold on. hold off. push off. push out. push outta fart. yea... i know im typin foolishness, but its wut i do when i dont wanna type. who's makin me type? i dunno. all i know is, i gots tah brush my teeth. yuppers. brushin ur teeth doesnt cause cavities. it prevents them. hopefully u know that already cuz if not,.....thas sad. im out. -a sad strange little man-
Yo
from January 03/05 Hi. Well, enjoy the photos. Oh, n make sure ur mature enuff to look at the free 4 all one. ya, pretty gruesome. anyways. oh n, jus in case ya didnt read the profile, ties ur shoes. cuz uhh, if ya dont, u might smash ur face in the pavement. i dont think u wanna do that...but if ya do, than go ahead, untie ur shoes. anyways, well, i hope u enjoy reading this blog. yea. its pretty educational, about ur shoes. yea. well, happy shoe tying!
uh, yup.
hey folks. i have moved my junk from my msn space, to this here, blogspot. so, the 25 blogs after this particular one, are old blogs from my msn space. jus for you to enjoy, and also, a good time waster....if you feel like wasting time. or you just wanna procrastinate, like my procrastinating self...man i hate typing that word. anyways, or if you just took a good crap, and need a bit of a sit down time. yea, that last one was pretty random. but o well. anyways, yea, so after this reading, youll have 25, twenty five, yup, 25 blogs. then ull come to the present. im out.
-hence-
